Hitting puberty and moving out.

I actually wanted to write this post last Friday, because I had my therapy and psychiatrist’s appointments and we talked about some stuff that I wanted to share and well…process, by typing a blog post. But then the tragedies in Sandy Hook and China (I cannot remember the name of the town/province, sorry) happened and I really didn’t feel like it.

I felt like mourning the losses and processing the tragedies and telling people I love them and writing Christmas cards (where I’m telling people I love them) and spending time with the family.

But…I’m feeling better now and I wanted to tell you that…*drumroll*…I finally hit puberty! Well…my brain did. My body hit puberty before I even knew it (And I mean that. I really didn’t realize it until I woke up one morning needing a bra size C), but my brain finally did. And you have no idea how freaked out I was when my psychiatrist was actually HAPPY about it. (I was like ‘Uhm..where am I’?)

Yeah. Let that sink in for a moment. Ha! 🙂 No, but really. I told him that I had a lot of fights with my parents (especially my mother) and that I sometimes cannot bear their presence and he was downright excited that it finally happened. Because, so he told me, I never really had a ‘puberty rage phase’ or whatever he called it, because I was in this bipolar hole when it should’ve happened (at 15/16/17) and that it was extremely awesome (that’s what he said!) that it’s happening now. And I’m like…o.O So yeah. Hitting puberty at 20 1/2 years. That’s how I roll.

Haha! I told my Mom and all she said was: “Oh, that’s great, honey, now I’ve got two bitchy daughters.” (My sister’s 16.)

And she said it in a dead-serious voice so I was almost rolling on the floor I was laughing so hard.

*sigh* Good times. Haha.

Also: Dr. W was ecstatic (I mean that. He literally jumped out of his chair, clapping his hands. I’m serious. No kidding.) when I told him I wanted to move out. He said it’s quite a good sign when someone with my history and diagnosis is trying to break through their dependence on someone or something else, in my case living with my parents. So…yeah. It’s not do-able at the moment, though, because 1. I obviously don’t have a job which equals no money and 2. I don’t have a car, so I can’t move too far away from my parents’ house because well…for obvious reasons. My parents would support me somehow in case I moved out and didn’t have too much money or if I moved somewhere they could pay they rent for, but then I wouldn’t have any furniture and no food, so…yeah. Not a real option. xD

But yeah. So ready to move out. So ready.

(In case you want to sponsor me, feel free to contact me. :D)

Therapy went fine as well…we did a breathing/experiencing-your-body exercise to find my inner strength, which went quite well… And I really did feel empowered after. And we talked about taking a yoga class, which I really think I should do. I think my body would quite enjoy it, and my brain might like it as well. And the gym in town is offering one starting in January. (Coincidence? I think not.)

Also: I want to freaking murder Ms Vane (my laptop). She’s only  (!!!) six, but obviously hitting puberty as well. Fun times. Grrr. D:


So…that’s about it.

Tell me…what are your plans for the holidays? I’m planning on a silent night. (xD)


In case I’m not blogging before Mythmas, have a great celebration (whatever you’re celebrating) and a great start into 2013! (And don’t let the zombies eat your brain tomorrow! I hope you’re all armed with flamethrowers and machetes?)

See y’all soon! 🙂



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